Monday, October 31, 2011

A quick update...

Saturday we got to play for a short time. We would have had about 2 hours, but she decided to take an hour to eat her lunch. I doubt it was a coincidence, but whatever.

I used the cane fairly hard, but still not hard enough to leave lasting marks. She still said she wasn't ready for that. I then flogged her pretty good, leaving her ass a nice pink. Of course it didn't last long.

After that she asked me to lay down, much to my surprise. She then gave me the best BJ she ever has. Nice and wet with slurping sounds and all. She still pulled me out of her mouth before I came, but maybe we're getting closer. She told me she gave me the good BJ because she refused to be tied up, and hoped it would make up for it. It was very good, but it doesn't compare. Totally different turn on for me.

I made her cum many times with the vibe, but she forgot to ask for permission so she got ten swats for it. She asked if the good BJ made up for forgetting. That was no...

It was good, but I was left a little disappointed for some reason. I think it was the fact that we had to rush, and her refusal to be tied. I may sound ungrateful, but it's how I felt. I didn't get what I need and that's the facts.

I hope everyone had a good weekend.

Happy Halloween!!!



  1. You are a very patient man William. You want her to submit, she wants to negotiate. I don't know how you do it. She "refuses" to be tied up and that's why you got the good bj?

    Come on!

    I don't know how you do it.


  2. You should be cannonised upon death William.

    I hate to be a fly in the ointment here but submissive tendancies are innate and can therefore only be moulded by the D type.

    Your partner appears to blow hot and cold and is pulling the strings much of the time, judging by your writings. Is it possible that she may be open to the idea of spankings/floggings but NOT into a power exchange (D/s) union. She seems very reluctant to relinquish control over to you and I do have to ask if she actually possesses the intrinsic submissive qualities you desire. Just a thought. One can't change someone who doesn't wish to be changed.

    I admire your tenacity, grace, patience and often selflessness and I do so hope it works out for you both, one way or the other.

  3. Thank you C, it is very difficult sometimes.
    DY, she definitely has a much easier time with pain than submission. It is due to her previous abusive marriage for the most part. I don't know if she will ever be able to submit to me, but I keep hoping. The thing is, she keeps telling me she wants to, then she doesn't follow through. Very frustrating!


  4. I have quite the opposite problem - i want to submit to a strong HOH I want him to spank me for my wrongdoings, all the time , and he wont. But i have to submit to his decisions whether to spank or not. Its hard.
    Good luck William
    love and hugs kiwi xxx

  5. kiwi,
    It's amazing how many responses I've had similar to yours. It seems a lot of us are mis-matched.
    Good luck in getting what you need too.


  6. Ugh, so sounds frustrating! I'm so sorry, William...

    It sounds like she's trying to be okay in one area (i.e. making progress with the blowjobs) so that she can "get out" of doing things she doesn't want...I think it might be a way for her to kind of manipulate the situation and get what she wants...

    Maybe you should tell her that gestures like that won't make any difference. Also, maybe you could try easing her into the bondage, under non-sexual circumstances? Maybe tie her hands together while you're both watching TV or something--so that she'll get used to being bound outside of the anxiety of sex and play, and it won't be as scary?

    Just a thought...Hope things keep improving!


  7. thank you for the suggestions Bre, but it might be hard to explain the tying to our young son...
    She is certainly trying to manipulate the situation with the offer of oral sex. I just keep trying to plug away and hoping things will change, but my confidence isn't very high.

  8. You don't have a TV in your bedroom or some place private? That's kind of what I had in mind...if not, you could always wait until he's not there, or after he's gone to bed, something like that...Anyway, whatever happens, I hope things start looking up.