She asked me a question in relation to my last post, and I didn't want to just leave a long comment that might not get read.
She wanted to know how much My slut would have to do to satisfy the sadist in me. If I would be happy even if she couldn't take all my pain. I wanted to try to amswer that here the best I could.
It isn't necessary that she be able to take the most intense pain I want to give. I know that wouold only be possible by a true masochist. As far as I know she isn't one....As far as I know. If she makes a serious effort to do her best, I will be happy with that. I do want to be able to give her quite intense pain, but I am realistic. As far as how far is far enough. Honestly I can't answer that right now. I think her attitude will dictate that. If she is trying to take as much as she can, and wants to push her limits as far as she can, I will certainly be satisfied with that.
I feel that if she also adds to that her submission, it will temper my need to take the pain side of it farther. I know there is always a give and take. She has limits as almost every sub does. I will always respect those limits.
She is actually able to take a fair amount of pain when you consider the wax, Wartenberg wheel, cane and flogger. She actually loves the flogger and wax, so there is a lot to work with there. If I can get her to trust me and do more bondage that would give me another outlet for the dark side of my personality. When I bound her tits and covered them with hot wax, that pleased the sadist in me. I don't just slowly drip the wax on, I pour it fairly quickly. Making her gasp. I get turned on just thinking about it. Watching it pour over her hard nipples is extremely HOT to me.
I think she will be able to satisfy the sadist in me. Maybe not to the extreme that I desire, but how often does that really happen if you are in a marriage. Especially considering she didn't go into the marriage completely understanding what I needed like I thought she did.
William
I think many of us go in a marriage not knowing what we want. Afterwards it would be a very coincidence if our wives turned out exactly a match to what we discover to be. Considering this you should count your blessings. I saw my marriage end for reasons from both sides. (It takes 2 to tango). After that I decided to seek out a submissive girl, taking in account what I was looking for. Here you risk making the opposite mistake, i.e. going with a woman that matches your kink but is incompatible. But I was fortunate that did not happen.
ReplyDeleteWas just passing through, not planning on posting, but had to comment on the posts, early days, but the message given is far more promising and generally I hope your happier.
ReplyDeleteWishing you the best.
William,
ReplyDeleteYou flatter me with the title of your post. I hope you did not think I was trying to insinuate that you owed me (or anyone else, for that matter) an explanation. I was merely posing it as a sort of rhetorical thought provoking question.
It is true that relationships - marriages especially - require compromise. It is also true that people grow and evolve. The ideals/wants/dislikes etc one has at the start may not always remain the same. Perhaps she is slowly changing in a way that pleases you. Your willingness to compromise on the degree to which she moves to your side may be changing also.
In any event, it sounds as if the path you are on is positive and I wish satisfaction for you both!
You asked a valid question, and I wanted to answer it. If I didn't want to , I wouldn't have. This blog is for me to share my experiences and to also learn from others experiences. I am always happy to answer questions when I can.
ReplyDeleteWilliam
This is good. I think you will get there, William, really I do. Even if it's slower than you may want. I don't think I will ever have the masochist in me satisfied by my hubby either, but maybe it's all right. There has to be compromise in any marriage, D/s or not.
ReplyDeleteBut your comment about the wax is making me wet. I'm going to have to dig out the candles and beg for them tomorrow night, I guess. And look, here I am, back on your blog. How long did I stay away? xoxo :)
Glad to see you back maui. I'm happy to hear I made you want the wax again. Have fun!!!
ReplyDeleteWilliam
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ReplyDeleteWilliam, I find your post both thought provoking and at times lightly sprinkled with sadness. For what it's worth, I believe You and yours journey is a solid one together and it seems to be progressing very well. I enjoy your blogs. If your sub/wife enjoys the rope, have you tried involving her in the art of it as well. I speak of Shibari, in particular a rope dress of binding, or even gauntlets/corset which when done correctly can also give a anchoring/cuffing point not to mention the beauty of it which Your sub may find beautiful. Just a thought William and keep writing your journey and I will keep reading. Cheers Sir W for kitten
ReplyDeleteWilliam, I know you're already answering baby girl's question with this post, but I have another question. You said that if your wife was willing to be more submissive, it would satisfy some of your need to inflict pain. Here's the question: Which is more important to you, giving pain to your wife or dominating her? Is the sadist in you stronger than the Dominant, or is it the other way around?
ReplyDeleteVery good question from Jake there....
ReplyDeleteVery good question Jake. Since the sadist has been fed more than the dominant, I'm not really sure. I definitely have very strong sadistic tastes, but the thought of My slut kneeling before me is a powerful image. Unfortunately she has yet to do this and may never do it. I'm sorry I don't have a better answer, but I honestly don't know. Good food for thought. Maybe I will come up with an answer and post about it at a later date.
ReplyDeleteWilliam
Thanks for sharing your answer, William, and I'll watch for you to post in greater detail if you decide to do so. In the meantime, best of luck in your relationship! Your struggles certainly make for interesting reading...
ReplyDelete