We played tonight. I started with the cane and flogger. She wasn't able to take much because her period is near. So we moved on to her vibe until she came a few times. Then we started talking about how I wanted to finish. I didn't want to just fuck because due to the fact that we hadn't done anything in almost two weeks, I knew I wouldn't last very long and that is always frustrating to me.
I told her what I wanted to do, but she wasn't willing to do it, so we were negotiating a way to make me happy when our son started hollering about needing help on the computer. By the time I got that squared away it was getting late and dinner had to be made. To make a long story short, I didn't get to finish.
We did talk a lot about what I want compared to what she thinks she can do. There is still some distance between us, but we are getting closer to a hopeful compromise. She told me she knows I can't bury those feelings. She knows the times I have, have been a disaster for me mentally. She felt bad not being able to do the things I want, and she's afraid I'll leave. I assured her that no matter what I'm not going anywhere.
I told her I just want her to give me her best, which she hasn't yet. She has to get past her fear of stepping out of her comfort zone. If she tries something and hates it, as long as she gives it an honest effort I will be satisfied.
I'm going to keep the dialog going, letting her know what my needs are and try to find a common ground between us.